Others’ Perception towards Me While Being Pregnant
While journey of pregnancy is deeply personal, it is often accompanied by an external reality: how others perceive and treat us during pregnancy. From family members to colleagues, strangers to friends—everyone seems to have an opinion, a suggestion, or a judgment. And navigating these perceptions can sometimes be just as challenging as the pregnancy itself.
In this article, I want to reflect on how being pregnant has shaped the way others view and respond to me, and how these responses affect my sense of identity, self-worth, and emotional well-being.
1. The Sudden Shift in Identity
As soon as people find out I’m pregnant, something shifts. I’m no longer seen just as me—an individual with a name, dreams, a career, and personality. I become “the pregnant woman.” My identity gets linked to the baby I’m carrying, and often, my individual self seems to blur in the background.
People talk more about my belly than about me. They ask about the baby’s health, movements, gender preference, and name. While this care is usually well-meaning, it also subtly sends the message: You matter because of the baby. It’s as if my role as a woman is now defined by my motherhood.
2. The Overload of Advice
Pregnancy, it seems, gives everyone permission to offer advice—whether or not it’s asked for.
• Elders and relatives will often share traditional wisdom.
• Friends who’ve had kids will compare their pregnancies with mine.
• Strangers in public places might comment on what I should eat, how I should walk, or what I should wear.
While some of this guidance comes from love and experience, it can quickly become overwhelming. I often feel like I’m being observed and evaluated, instead of trusted to figure things out on my own or with my doctor’s help.
3. Physical Appearance Gets a Spotlight
Before pregnancy, my body was rarely a topic of public discussion. Now, it’s suddenly open for commentary. People feel free to say things like:
• “You’re glowing!”
• “You’re huge!”
• “Are you sure it’s not twins?”
• “You don’t even look pregnant!”
These comments—whether intended as compliments or not—make me hyper-aware of how my body is being watched and judged. Pregnancy changes every part of my physical being, and hearing others' opinions about it can either boost my confidence or make me feel exposed and vulnerable.
4. Assumptions About My Capabilities
There is also a tendency for people to assume what I can or can’t do just because I’m pregnant. For example:
• At work, colleagues may assume I want fewer responsibilities or can’t handle stress.
• At home, family members might stop me from lifting things, climbing stairs, or even cooking.
• Socially, friends may stop inviting me to events, assuming I’m too tired or too “different” now.
While care and concern are appreciated, assumptions can feel limiting. I want to be the one to say what I can or cannot manage—not have others decide for me.
5. The “Perfect Mother” Expectations
People often begin to expect a certain kind of behavior from a pregnant woman:
• Always calm, glowing, and joyful
• Never irritable, anxious, or unsure
• Always making “the right” decisions for the baby
These unrealistic expectations can make pregnancy harder. In truth, pregnancy is a mix of joy and discomfort, hope and fear, strength and vulnerability. When people expect perfection, it makes it difficult to be honest about what I’m really going through.
6. Pressure from Cultural Norms and Traditions
In many cultures, pregnancy is surrounded by a range of customs and beliefs. People might:
• Enforce certain food taboos
• Expect me to follow rituals or ceremonies
• Make decisions on my behalf based on tradition, not science
While some traditions bring comfort and connection to family roots, others may feel restrictive or outdated. If I question them, it’s often seen as disrespect or rebellion, even if I’m simply trying to make the best, most informed choice for myself and my baby.
7. Public Reactions and Social Behavior
When I walk into a room or travel in public, I often notice how strangers behave differently around me:
• Some people smile kindly or offer help
• Some avoid eye contact, unsure what to say
• Others feel entitled to touch my belly without permission
These social dynamics can be confusing. Sometimes I appreciate the kindness of strangers. Other times, the lack of boundaries or awkwardness makes me feel uncomfortable or even invisible.
8. Emotional Impact of Perceptions
All of these perceptions—whether subtle or overt—add to the emotional weight I carry during pregnancy. I often ask myself:
• Am I doing enough?
• Am I being judged?
• Do people still see me as “me,” or just as a pregnant woman?
It takes emotional strength to balance what others expect with what I truly feel and need. Some days, I feel empowered by the support around me. Other days, I feel isolated and misunderstood.
9. Reclaiming My Voice and Identity
To protect my emotional well-being, I’ve learned to set boundaries:
• I kindly but firmly decline unwanted advice.
• I communicate openly with family about my choices.
• I trust my instincts and medical guidance over unsolicited opinions.
• I remind myself that I am still me—creative, intelligent, capable—even while becoming a mother.
Pregnancy is a chapter of life—not my entire identity. And I deserve to be treated with respect, dignity, and trust.
10. What I Wish Others Understood
Here’s what I wish people would remember when interacting with a pregnant woman:
• Don’t assume. Ask how I’m feeling instead of telling me what I should feel.
• Offer help, but respect my independence.
• Celebrate my pregnancy, but remember I’m still an individual with dreams and goals.
• Allow me space to be human, not just maternal.
Conclusion: A Journey of Dual Awareness
Being pregnant isn’t just about growing a baby—it’s about growing into a new version of myself. But along this journey, I also carry the weight of how the world sees me. Other people’s perceptions—whether supportive or challenging—affect my self-image, my confidence, and my emotional health.
Still, I remind myself every day: I am the mother, the vessel, the guide—but I am also a person. And as long as I remain true to myself, I can navigate this chapter with strength, grace, and authenticity—no matter how others perceive me.
In this article, I want to reflect on how being pregnant has shaped the way others view and respond to me, and how these responses affect my sense of identity, self-worth, and emotional well-being.
1. The Sudden Shift in Identity
As soon as people find out I’m pregnant, something shifts. I’m no longer seen just as me—an individual with a name, dreams, a career, and personality. I become “the pregnant woman.” My identity gets linked to the baby I’m carrying, and often, my individual self seems to blur in the background.
People talk more about my belly than about me. They ask about the baby’s health, movements, gender preference, and name. While this care is usually well-meaning, it also subtly sends the message: You matter because of the baby. It’s as if my role as a woman is now defined by my motherhood.
2. The Overload of Advice
Pregnancy, it seems, gives everyone permission to offer advice—whether or not it’s asked for.
• Elders and relatives will often share traditional wisdom.
• Friends who’ve had kids will compare their pregnancies with mine.
• Strangers in public places might comment on what I should eat, how I should walk, or what I should wear.
While some of this guidance comes from love and experience, it can quickly become overwhelming. I often feel like I’m being observed and evaluated, instead of trusted to figure things out on my own or with my doctor’s help.
3. Physical Appearance Gets a Spotlight
Before pregnancy, my body was rarely a topic of public discussion. Now, it’s suddenly open for commentary. People feel free to say things like:
• “You’re glowing!”
• “You’re huge!”
• “Are you sure it’s not twins?”
• “You don’t even look pregnant!”
These comments—whether intended as compliments or not—make me hyper-aware of how my body is being watched and judged. Pregnancy changes every part of my physical being, and hearing others' opinions about it can either boost my confidence or make me feel exposed and vulnerable.
4. Assumptions About My Capabilities
There is also a tendency for people to assume what I can or can’t do just because I’m pregnant. For example:
• At work, colleagues may assume I want fewer responsibilities or can’t handle stress.
• At home, family members might stop me from lifting things, climbing stairs, or even cooking.
• Socially, friends may stop inviting me to events, assuming I’m too tired or too “different” now.
While care and concern are appreciated, assumptions can feel limiting. I want to be the one to say what I can or cannot manage—not have others decide for me.
5. The “Perfect Mother” Expectations
People often begin to expect a certain kind of behavior from a pregnant woman:
• Always calm, glowing, and joyful
• Never irritable, anxious, or unsure
• Always making “the right” decisions for the baby
These unrealistic expectations can make pregnancy harder. In truth, pregnancy is a mix of joy and discomfort, hope and fear, strength and vulnerability. When people expect perfection, it makes it difficult to be honest about what I’m really going through.
6. Pressure from Cultural Norms and Traditions
In many cultures, pregnancy is surrounded by a range of customs and beliefs. People might:
• Enforce certain food taboos
• Expect me to follow rituals or ceremonies
• Make decisions on my behalf based on tradition, not science
While some traditions bring comfort and connection to family roots, others may feel restrictive or outdated. If I question them, it’s often seen as disrespect or rebellion, even if I’m simply trying to make the best, most informed choice for myself and my baby.
7. Public Reactions and Social Behavior
When I walk into a room or travel in public, I often notice how strangers behave differently around me:
• Some people smile kindly or offer help
• Some avoid eye contact, unsure what to say
• Others feel entitled to touch my belly without permission
These social dynamics can be confusing. Sometimes I appreciate the kindness of strangers. Other times, the lack of boundaries or awkwardness makes me feel uncomfortable or even invisible.
8. Emotional Impact of Perceptions
All of these perceptions—whether subtle or overt—add to the emotional weight I carry during pregnancy. I often ask myself:
• Am I doing enough?
• Am I being judged?
• Do people still see me as “me,” or just as a pregnant woman?
It takes emotional strength to balance what others expect with what I truly feel and need. Some days, I feel empowered by the support around me. Other days, I feel isolated and misunderstood.
9. Reclaiming My Voice and Identity
To protect my emotional well-being, I’ve learned to set boundaries:
• I kindly but firmly decline unwanted advice.
• I communicate openly with family about my choices.
• I trust my instincts and medical guidance over unsolicited opinions.
• I remind myself that I am still me—creative, intelligent, capable—even while becoming a mother.
Pregnancy is a chapter of life—not my entire identity. And I deserve to be treated with respect, dignity, and trust.
10. What I Wish Others Understood
Here’s what I wish people would remember when interacting with a pregnant woman:
• Don’t assume. Ask how I’m feeling instead of telling me what I should feel.
• Offer help, but respect my independence.
• Celebrate my pregnancy, but remember I’m still an individual with dreams and goals.
• Allow me space to be human, not just maternal.
Conclusion: A Journey of Dual Awareness
Being pregnant isn’t just about growing a baby—it’s about growing into a new version of myself. But along this journey, I also carry the weight of how the world sees me. Other people’s perceptions—whether supportive or challenging—affect my self-image, my confidence, and my emotional health.
Still, I remind myself every day: I am the mother, the vessel, the guide—but I am also a person. And as long as I remain true to myself, I can navigate this chapter with strength, grace, and authenticity—no matter how others perceive me.
Related Question:
What are the different comments you received from others while experiencing pregnancy? Share with us